Yay Queen Esther!  Yay Morechai!  Boo Haman!!!

Happy Purim to the land of TiFaux!

Should you go to law school? Saved By the Bell, as always, has the answer.

Look, I’m not saying that I make a HABIT of watching ABC Family Originals. My sunday is pretty much jammed with Grey’s Anatomy, Family Guy, and Cheerleader Nation (which, by the way, OMG, it’s best show tv has seen in forever– forevah evah? forevah evah!). But when Channel 14 promises me The Cutting Edge Two: Going For The Gold, well, I sit up and I pay attention.

We all remember The Cutting Edge, yes? If pressed, I would say that between 40-60% of my close friends own this on VHS. And it continues to be worth the $8 they originally spent for it. So, so, good. Small plot summary: Doug Dorsey has his Olympic hockey career ended by an eye injury (is it an eye injury? A concussion? Help me out here) and is recruited to complete a pairs figure skating team with spoiled and haughty Kate Moseley, who is on her way not only to marrying the wrong guy, but to living a life of quiet predictability when Doug arrives to shake things up. FYI, Doug is played by DB Sweeney, whose IMDB headshot rivals Hugh Grant’s mug shot– not in terms of attractiveness, but rather creepy cracked out desperation. Perhaps this is because his biggest project since The Cutting Edge was short lived teen series “Live as we know it” with kelly osbourne. I’m just postulating. Anyway, there are some hilarious moments (”Hey, there’s only two things I do well, sweetheart, and skating’s the other one!”) and appropriate third act complications before they realize they’re in love and kick some ass at the Olympics.

I know what you’re thinking, and I’m one step ahead of you (as per always)– how could a plot so interesting and not at all formulaic be manipulated into a made for TV sequel? Will the Hilary Duff fans of the universe really tune in for a sassy skating movie? Can we ride the wave of the 06 Winter Games right into the shore of Cutting Edge 2 without wanting to take a skate blade to the temple?

This time, the sassy ice queen figure skater (get it? ice queen? Appropriate BOTH because of her skating on ice, and also her chilly demeanor?) hooks up with an equally sassy Xgames inline skater during a summer outing at the beach. Here’s the thing, though– neither knows that the other is famous for their respective athletic triumphs! They love each other based just on who they are! And, I’m guessing, the dude’s fondness for puka shell necklaces and the girl’s insistence on wearing spandex! But wait, then they find out that they hadn’t been totally upfront with one another! and they get upset and part ways! then she needs a new skating partner! and GUESS WHO shows up at auditions! But then, OMG, his exgirlfriend who looks like a scary mix between skeletor and Jeri Ryan shows up! And the pair totally blows their long program! And we’re JUST NOT SURE if they’re going to pull it out in the end, romantically or otherwise!

I don’t want to ruin the ending for you, so please just make a point to catch the repeats. And when you do, please mentally explore this topic: Who is Figure Skating Chick an odd hybrid of?

 I’m going with Jennifer Love Hewitt, Hayley from the OC, and a splash of Jennifer Garner. Thoughts?