Which is more apt: con-men? con-people? con-persons? con-artists?

Posted by Maggie July 5th, 2006 at 11:20am In All Things TV Guilty Pleasures Lost

Before we get to the maudlin self-reflection, important news for this week:

WEDNESDAY: Rock Star returns. This show takes the format of American Idol, adds Dave Navarro and a bunch of self-important poser "rock stars" (most of whom starred in regional touring companies of Rent), sprinkles in a fair heaping of Queen covers, and is hilarious and genuinely entertaining. 

THURSDAY: Emmy nominations come out. There's a new voting system in place that seems like it might favor underdogs, which means I am crossing my fingers for Lauren Graham, who seems to have a chance finally, and Kristen Bell, who doesn't really have a chance even with the new rules but is just so cute you can't help rooting for her.

FRIDAY: Turn to USA for a new episoded of Monk (Stanley Tucci guest stars, and who doesn't love Stanley Tucci, especially after The Devil Wears Prada) and the premiere of Psych, which looks promising. 

So. Con-artistry and internal monologues, after the jump.

I spent a portion of my extended fourth of July weekend watching disks three and four of the first season of Lost. I am way late for this bandwagon, so forgive me. (Also, I'd put a picture here, but I'm afraid of goggling the show and inadvertantly learning something I didn't want to know, like when I looked on IMDB and saw (2004-2005) after some people's names, and now I'm just sitting around waiting for those people to die.)

I don't think it's a coincidence that so many of the characters on the island are professional or semi-professional or amateur-trying-to- break-into-the-big-leagues con-artists. It's, like, totally a metaphor for the show, conning us into watching it and obsessing over it when there's actually nothing there.

This is not to say I'm going to stop watching. I have a deep love/hate relationship with it already.

However, there are some things I am going to stop watching after a brief attempt to add new things to my summer schedule, namely: Angel, Hex, and Smallville. They all have redeeming qualities (in order: occasional Whedon wit, fun accents, and Tom Welling), but I actually do feel stupider after watching them, which hardly ever happens to me. For example, here's an approximation of my internal monologue while watching Smallville:

Why am I doing this. Who are these people. Why isn't the writing better. These scenes feel forced. I should clean my apartment. I bet there's a Seinfeld rerun on, or maybe Veronica — Oh! Oh… cute… too cute… How are they all not jumping on him every second. I bet everyone on the set loves him. I bet they all want to make out with him. I bet the cameraman has to painfully make himself shoot the other characters, and it must be really hard for the editors to have to cut away from him at any point. Oh… so cute… wait, where did he go? HEY! BRING HIM BACK! Baldy, get out of here! Pretty chick, no one cares about you and your ass boyfriend! Blonde chick, take your smirk and shove it! Old people, scram! Everyone else, just — oh. Hi there. Oh… cute… so cute…"record entire series"… awesome…

See what I mean?