One of my favorite writer/bloggers (writer cause he writes for actual printed publications, blogger because he devotes miles of internet space to the discussion of The Devil Wears Prada as a great movie for dudes to see), ESPN's The Sports Guy, recently posted a fantastic reader comment about fantasy camp. For those of you who don't live and die on the field, baseball or otherwise, fantasy camp is basically for unathletic people with lots of money. You pay for a week of training camp with your favorite professional athletes as a way to finally overcome all of those issues you've been harboring since you weren't able to break 80 feet in the javelin throw as a high school sophomore and in no way do I mean that as a problem specific to me, but rather one that could apply to everyone.

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Q: The other night I woke up in mid-laugh. I was dreaming of something so great that it needed to be shared with you. In my dream I was attending a "Saved By the Bell" fantasy camp where we (the campers) would act out our favorite episodes. We used the actual sets from the show. In my dream we were sitting at the far-right booth at The Max when I awoke in laughter. My friends and I came up with some other ideas for fantasy camps that we would attend, like MacGyver and AirWolf. What camp would you want to go to and why?
–Scott L., Tacoma, Wash

SG: The best feature of a "Saved By The Bell" fantasy camp would be Dustin Diamond hardballing them for an appearance fee. Anyway, I'd want to go to the "Grey's Anatomy" camp so I could grab my fake girlfriend, look into her eyes, take a dramatic pause, then belt out a line like, "I don't love you for who you are. … I love you for who you're not." I'd want to go to "CSI: Miami" camp to play Caruso's character in various scenes. ("We need … to find … the body … before … sunset. … "). I'd want to go to "90210" camp so I could get filmed doing the turnarounds in the opening credits. But most of all, I'd want to go to "The Bachelor" fantasy camp and just reenact rose ceremonies and bad dates. I think I'd pay $4,000 for this.

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The possibilities of this are endless. I'd also like to point out that my little brother already kind of invented this– in high school, he wanted to do a fundraiser where the drama kids would act out famous episodes of Seinfeld, Friends, etc, and I can't believe that never took off. Then again, I also claim to have invented the debit card and the privatization of social security, because when credit cards and social security were explained to me, I automatically assumed that the credit card was deducting from your bank account, and that all the money I was paying out of my taxes was going to buy me a totally sweet-ass ride when I was 65. Moving on.

I'm into this idea, obviously. Now I just need to narrow my choices down.

24 Fantasy Camp

Pros- Don't need to take any vacation time from work because camp only lasts a day; Get to save the world; Have the best cell phone service; Free aviator shades.

Cons- Everyone you love is killed; Voice gets hoarse from whisper-yelling; Have to wear the same clothes all the time; No one cares when plot lines are dropped without explanation; Existential life crisis (I'm assuming).

Entourage Fantasy Camp

Pros- Get to be famous without having any actual talent; Cool cars; Live in a world where it's okay to over emphasize every one of your lines without anyone looking at you oddly; Get to quote PCU lines to Jeremy Piven until he threatens to strangle you.

Cons- The harsh realization that the show should be 3,000% better than it actually is; Being executive-produced by Mark Whalberg.

Dawson's Creek Fantasy Camp

Pros- The discount dual package for you and your platonic best friend; ladder climbing experience will later serve you well in your firefighting career; Learn lots of big words.

Cons- May come out a scientologist.

Sex & The City Fantasy Camp

Pros- Get to stare off whimsically while your voiceover asks "I couldn't help but wonder…"

Cons- STDs; Perpetrating the myth already rampant among NY women that as long as you wear sassy outfits, it's okay to be fiscally irresponsible and totally self centered.