Do WORK

Posted by Cristin May 14th, 2007 at 11:33am In MTV Reality

I know all you smart people with actual attention spans are mourning the end of sitcoms and dramas and shows with “plots” that “require a base level of human intelligence” but as we get into season finale, uh, season, all I can think is: Summer reality shows! BRING THE PAIN!

Specifically:

Rob & Big comes back for Season 2– May 22.

Listen, Rob & Big might be one of the best shows on TV. This show does for friendship what Run’s House does for family. This show will make you want to call your best friend from elementary school and tell them how much they mean to you (see also: Bridge to Terabithia the movie). This show (it appears) will now include a mini horse as a member of their household:

And now, time for a needless aside where I can show off the useless information gained at the very expensive pony summer camp I begged my parents to send me to: You have horses and you have ponies. Ponies are basically short horses, they are not BABY horses. They’ll never grow up to be horses. Then you have minis, which are basically horse midgets. They won’t grow up to be ponies or horses, they’ll just stay tiny and goat-sized forever. I have no idea how genetic engineering handled this, I’m guessing it came from the same lab that gave us Mini Dobermans. Whoever did it, though, I applaud you! What an excellent use of resources! Look how tiny and cute that mini is!

Also, in my experience, the mini can be one bad mothershutyourmouth. The one farm I rode at that housed minis had to keep them in a pasture separate from the “real” horses because the minis would do stuff like biting them on the ankles then running away. Is this awesome and hilarious? Yes. Does this mean you should keep this animal in your living room? No, Rob & Big, you silly bastards! But I love you anyway! See you May 22!

Also on the tifaux: CBS’s pirate reality show. Is this a terrible idea? Yes. Am I your exact target demographic and will I therefore be watching it anyway? Yes.