It’s Thursday. You know what that means? You probably don’t, because I just kind of decided this. Thursday is official Who Would Win in a Fight day for the summer. Think of it as a reward for making it almost all the way through the week.

Seems like last week’s battle between Studio 60 pill-head Matt Albie and bed-hopping brain surgeon Derek Shepherd ended in a decisive victory for our conflicted comedy writer. I support the decision due to Albie’s unhinged nature and comparative bulk.

This week finds a troubled rich kid going head-to-head with yet another doctor named Shephard. It’s Veronica Mars’ on-again-off-again beau Logan Echolls versus Lost’s castaway leader Jack Shephard.

Logan Echolls

Strengths:

• Kind of a sociopath
• Way buff
• Not easily intimidated

Weaknesses:

• Used to pushing around people who are smaller than him (e.g. Piz, that reporter spy from early in season three, organizing bum fights)
• Veronica doesn’t like it when he fights
• Growing rap sheet

Secret Weapon: Baby-face may inspire underestimation

Jack Shephard

Strengths:

• Abrasive stubble could be used as a weapon
• Can take a punch
• Strong-willed, hard to push around

Weaknesses:

• He’s no kid
• When on the island, he’s weary from being exposed to the elements
• When off the island he’s drunk

Secret Weapon: Good at harnessing his rage

A highly underutilized instrument.

• A heart-to-heart with J-Wahl.
• Wayne Brady will host a game show where people have to remember song lyrics. Like every awful theater nerd party you’ve ever been to.
• TV Guide weighs the reality cooking shows against each other.
• VH1 has a bunch of new shows, including a Salt and Pepa reality show and a game show for models.
• Law and Order blurs the line between entertainment and politics even further by entertaining the idea of casting a former senator.
• Studio 60 with a laugh track.
• The Office will be a video game.
• Smashing Pumpkins will do Letterman twice in July. This is going to hurt.
• Ghost Hunters is back.  Boo.
• AMC has greenlit a drama series with Bryan Cranston.
• Planned Parenthood gets all liberal crazy on FOX and CBS (and rightfully so) for refusing to air condom ads.
• Finally, here’s an awesome way to waste some time: the top 10 moments from 30 Rock.