In the closest battle yet, it appears that Heroes’ Angela Petrelli (looking very Cruella in the picture I found) has whupped Arrested Development’s Lucille Bluth. I agree with the decision, even though I have a deeper fondness for AD than Heroes. Lucille just doesn’t seem like much of a fighter is all.

This week’s battle might require some thought. We have two silver foxes duking it out in a winner-take-all bloodbath. It’s CNN’s news-reading pin-up Anderson Cooper (or Cooper Anderson, as my Mom calls him) versus Project Runway’s dapper father-figure Tim Gunn.

Don’t let age be too much of a factor (it is, after all only 13 years — Cooper’s 40 to Gunn’s 53 [thank you Wikipedia]).

Anderson Cooper

Strengths:

• Comparative youth is a factor
• Keeps in shape (probably takes kickboxing classes)
• Probably has a sassy fighting outfit

Weaknesses:

• Defensive about gay questions
• Former model
• Prettyboy (see Derek Shepherd)

Secret Weapon: Learned tricks of mental warfare as host of The Mole

Tim Gunn

Strengths:

• His name is Tim Gunn
• Commands authority
• James Bond-ish demeanor implies that he is downplaying his combat skills

Weaknesses:

• Probably doesn’t like to get dirty
• Would rather talk it out
• Probably blind without glasses

Secret Weapon: Too lovable to punch

So I’ve finally started watching the most critically-acclaimed new show of last year, Friday Night Lights. I’m only seven episodes in, but I have to say I’m charmed. I’m not crazed with joy or anything (those type of obsessive thoughts don’t usually show up until episode 10 or 12 of a new series), but I can certainly see why everyone’s so gosh-darned excited about this one. It’s good.

They’ve pulled together a really sympathetic and well-cast group of characters, especially the alarmingly adorable last-minute quarterback, Matt Saracen. Everyone’s excellent, and I only single out Matt because of the way I want to give him a big hug and cook him some chicken soup and tell him how great he is every time he’s on screen. He’s that painfully in need of mothering. Trust me, your ovaries will explode.

I have concerns, of course. I’m concerned that the whole thing is a giant sports movie, with mini-sports-movies peppered throughout. They’re very well-done and extremely exciting, but we know sports movies. I’m also concerned about the occasionally irritating camera work. I like the way it’s loose and can focus on fun little details we might not have seen otherwise, but sometimes I get the sense it’s jerky and weird just to be jerky and weird. And I’m concerned they’re cycling through hugely dramatic story arcs too fast. So much has happened in these seven short episodes. This might be a result of watching them all in a row (and interspersing episodes of the much slower-paced [and much better than everyone says it is] John from Cincinnati), but I think that slowing down and dealing with the stories already on the table might be good instead of constantly adding new ones.

Long-time fans, you’re probably laughing and shaking your heads at my newbie naivete. I’m sure in a couple episodes I’ll be embarrassed to have complained at all. In the meantime, GO MATT!

I was in an eight-bedroom lesbian mansion yesterday.  It was amazing.

• Johnny Knoxville and Wayne Brady are back on the market.
• Apparently Ant from Last Comic Standing is drunk with power.
• Man-children can now watch Adult Swim 7 days a week.
• A few FOX pilots aren’t as dead as we thought they were.
• New cast member on Boston Legal.
• A new Ask Ausiello.  Read all about it.