Jay Leno as the elderly administrative assistant

Posted by Dan July 23rd, 2008 at 11:13am In General

Okay, kids. Story time.

I used to have a job a long, long time ago and there was this old lady there who had worked with the company since the dawn of time. She wore coke bottle glasses, had a big mushroom-y haircut and, inexplicably, drove a convertible to work every day.

I’m pretty sure she had aged out of usefulness to the company, but she had been there for too long to simply just let go. My hunch is that she spent her days watering her plants, rearranging her office supplies and saddling up next to other ladies’ desks to talk about gossip I’m sure they’d already been over a few times.

One day, she disappeared — her peace lilies packed up, her office supplies stolen or bequeathed to others. Soon enough, along came a companywide e-mail saying that she had retired and wanted to make a quiet exit. To be honest, it was a classy exit for a strange bird.

This all brings me to Jay Leno.

Leno hasn’t aged well into his role as late night host (this is a favorite topic of mine). Aside from his dreadful monologues (which, apparently, he’s some sort insane workaholic about), his interviews are staged-seeming and awkward, and his few funny-ish gags are mostly fun because they rely on external sources to bring the humor (the “Jaywalking” segment, “Headlines”).

Leno’s been doing this show since I was a kid and now that he’s faced with unemployment, he’s not taking it very gracefully, making bitter remarks at press conferences while wearing prosthetics, a bald cap and a fake beard.

There’s a lot to say here about being self-aware, being mature and leaving on a high note. All I’ll say is this: if NBC sends a nationwide e-mail tomorrow saying that Jay Leno is gone and that there won’t be a party with cake in the conference room, I’d think most people would (or should) be okay with that.