Can anyone implant a chip in my brain to have me speak in a Cockney accent?

• The writers strike might screw with next season too.
• The TV Addict talks to Elizabeth Mitchell from Lost.
• Oprah is expanding her empire with a cable network.
• Want to be on the next Top Design or Shear Genius?  Have at it.
• NBC is re-making a British car show called Top Gear.
• Get ready for Flavor of Love with…  Emmanuel Lewis.
• A new Ask Ausiello has info on the eventual return of 24.
• E-Kristin talks about Mad Men — which you can now catch on Sundays at midnight.  Maggie, I’m guessing, still thinks you shouldn’t watch.

They were playing Laura Veirs in Starbucks!

• A 30 second ad on American Idol costs more than your life.
• American Gladiators has already been renewed.
• E-Kristin has a spoiler chat featuring Lost.
• Seems like the whole gang is around for High School Musical 3.
• Terminator appears to be a hit.
• Barack Obama loves The Wire.  Or at least that’s what his campaign advisors told him to say to get him in with the hip, artsy demographic.
• Chile is getting its own version of The Office.
• ABC producers are getting the ax thanks to the writers strike.

Despite being reduced to a fancy-looking press conference, as experienced at our house, last night’s Golden Globes were the best ever. After watching the surprisingly good Sarah Connor Chronicles pilot, we switched over to an already recorded copy of the Press Conference. We fast-forwarded through every single extemporaneous bit of commentary and watched a series of clips and award announcements in about 20 minutes. Like Dan, I had no interest in hearing what Billy Bush has to say about anything.

I’m very happy about the Tina Fey win, but awarding a perfectly good movie like Atonement when you have two  movies that are head and shoulders above every other movie released this year really highlights what a farce the whole Golden Globes thing is. They’re awarded by an association of fewer than 90 entertainment journalists. Why their opinion means anything is beyond me. In a category with 6 nominees you could get a plurality with 15 votes. Anyway, There Will Be Blood was robbed.

Oh, Nancy.  Nancy, Nancy, Nancy…

• Adelaide, Australia, wants to ban Dexter ads because the town is already chock full of serial killers, apparently.
• A Gossip Girl star is apparently having a real life peep show.
• Apparently, all a show has to do is advertise “all new” to have viewers come a-runnin.
• The Bachelorette will be returning.
• Kimberly Locke is dating her old Celebrity Fit Club trainer.
• The Wire’s portrayal of The Baltimore Sun is completely inaccurate… according to the paper itself.
• Matt Roush talks about the success of Dexter.
• The This American Life DVDs will only be available at Borders.
• Dominic Purcell of Prison Break talks to E-Kristin.
• The Little People, Big World dad is out of legal trouble.

Willpower alone is enough to keep illness away, right?

• A FOX employee tried to run over a picketing dude from Law and Order.
• That Scott Baio — what a scamp!
• Thomas Dekker talks about The Sarah Connor Chronicles.
• Sonja, the first-ever Survivor loser, used her prize money to help build a church (note — this is a confusing article).
• The NY Times explores what real thugs think of The Wire.
• Dr. Drew defends Celebrity Rehab.
• E-Kristin predicts the Golden Globe winners.
• Morgan Spurlock signed a big deal with FOX.
• Pop Matters has a practical guide to purchasing a new HDTV.

Looks like Ricky Gervais might be spinning off one of the characters from Extras.

Per RTE Entertainment:

Ricky Gervais may be planning an Extras spin-off starring Stephen Merchant’s dopey agent and Barry from ‘EastEnders’ as a pair of bumbling crimefighters.
…
“The one thing we did bandy about, half in jest and half seriously, was the idea of a spin-off for my character Barry and the agent. Ricky thought they could go around in a camper van solving crimes or something.”
He added: “That’s strictly on the backburner for now as Ricky is busy in Hollywood at the moment. I’d jump at the chance to work with him again.”

For some reason, I love the idea of spin-offs. On one hand, it smacks of desperately trying to recapture the profitability of a deceased series. On the other hand, it allows characters who never realized their full potential to flourish.

It could work. It could not work. No one needs another Private Practice lead balloon.

Makes me wonder — if their respective series went kaput, which characters would have the most promising spin-offs.

You guys, he may seem nice, but he’s crazy. I’m not talking about Obama.

• People interviews the latest Project Runway castoff.
• The WGA yelled at Jay Leno for breaking its rules.
• There’s going to be another season of The Two Coreys. Because I guess the first one already aired.
• TV Guide has a guide of what to watch during the strike.
• Zoey 101 hasn’t been canceled because of you-know-who’s fetus.
• Law and Order is going to London.
• TV Guide talks to The Wire’s Clark Peters and new show host Carson Kressley.
• Noah from Heroes defends the show’s second season.
• Nick Hornby interviews the creator of The Wire.
• Wallace Shawn surrounded by lesbians.
• MTV is going to air another Gauntlet. I will not watch.
• E-Kristin has scoop on the last pre-strike episode of Grey’s.
• Survivor’s cast has been announced and it includes fan favorites Cirie and Yau-Man.
• Nate Berkus will host Oprah’s Big Give.

Lookin’ at you, Vance and Liz.

• Conan and David bearded it up last night when their shows returned.
• Omarosa talks about her return to the Celebrity Apprentice.
• Fox is shuffling its mid-season schedule again.
• Tila Tequila. Again.
• The main guy behind Brothers and Sisters has been “ousted.” His words not mine.
• They’re casting for a Gossip Girl reality show.
• Jeez… they canceled the Serbian Big Brother after three evicted contestants got killed.
• Cher and her daughter Chastity will be working on a reality show.
• Gloria Reuben is back on ER.
• Are TV theme songs dead?
• Some dude says Work Out was his idea.
• The Baltimore Sun ain’t happy with its portrayal on The Wire.

I don’t know what I was doing on New Year’s, but I’m pretty sure lunges were never involved.

• Kate Walsh talks to TV Guide about being a “cougar.” Which is apparently new slang for “old horny lady.”
• Letterman and Leno are back tonight — Dave’s got writers and Jay doesn’t.
• Battlestar Galactica season 3 DVDs go on sale on March 25.
• Carson from Queer Eye has a new show on Lifetime.
• Blogging Project Runway discusses its reservations with the return of Chris.
• TV Squad lays out the winter TV schedule.

Lots of shot-over-gauze retrospectives in this batch.

• TV Guide lists some memorable 07 TV moments.
• Letterman’s writers are returning to work.
• Reality Blurred looks back at 2007.
• A rumored cast list has emerged for the half-all-star season of Survivor.
• Zap2It lists the year’s biggest guilty pleasures.
• E-Kristin’s looking ahead to some (gasp) new scripted programming in 08. She even has a list of winter premiere dates.