Last week’s Work Out saw the female trainers entering the lesbian lion’s den, with the part of the lion being played by an Olivia cruise ship full of ladyfolk. Jackie’s girlfriend is understandably eyebrow-raisey over the whole escapade because of Rebecca’s participation. Her suspicions end up being warranted after Rebecca accidentally forgets her bikini and has to show her ass to everyone in the bathing suit store.

Meanwhile, the new gay trainer/masseur J.D. starts at Sky. He joins Peeler, stony ab Greg and Jesse as they grill meat and decide to do some sort of race where they run in mud.

But nevermind half-assed summaries of last week’s episode, here’s our Q&A with our resident lesbians…

Gretchen from South Dakota wants to know: Why do lesbians like going on cruises so much? Is it something Rosie O’Donnell started?

Sam: I’ve never been on a lesbian cruise, but I think I may understand why the lesbians are into them as much as they are. There is something about being confined together. You have no options to leave and you are surrounded by women, it gives you an excuse to do what you actually want to do. Kinda look at it like drinking at a bar. For whatever reason, women need the booze to actually follow their desires. Now add a ship with a lot of alcohol and a lot of women and a bunch of beds. Then they can spend their quality time together. Find the “love of their life” and have the u-haul waiting for when the ship docks to move in together.

Jasmine: Gretchen, I think cruises are the women’s music festival of the new century. I’m all for it - I would much rather get drunk at a bar and hook up in a nice, dry bed instead of drinking out of a flask in a field and having sex in a damn sleeping bag in a cold tent.

Frank from Lincoln, Nebraska writes: I was shocked when Jackie took over Rebecca and Erika’s boot camp! Is she on a power trip or something? Is this just a quiet way of asserting her dominance over Rebecca?

Sam: Jackie’s a bitch and alpha male. Period.

Jasmine: Ditto (and its really hot!).

Esteban from Seattle asks: Naked Jackie got a rub-down from the new gay guy! Was that non-sexual tension as weird for you as it was for me?

Sam: Well Esteban, I can speak to experience with this seeing how I’m having a secret love affair with a gay man myself. If you are gay, I recommend you find yourself a lesbian and spend some quality time with her. You’ll understand soon enough. Trust me, its a market thats not been tapped yet.

Jasmine: Esteban, I actually thought the non-sexual tension was very refreshing. I’m tired of the plain, boring, old sexual kind.

Leslie from Utah says: I noticed that Jackie wore a man’s tie on a recent episode. I’ve heard this is called “pulling a Poundstone.” Is that true?

Sam: I dunno, maybe? Personally I’ve never head this phrase and I’ve worn a tie or two myself. Maybe they are saying it behind my back, I’ll ask when I get a chance and get back to you.

Jasmine: Leslie, I’ve never heard that phrase, but that is what it should be called. I’m going to start using it every chance I get. Thanks for the information!

Not that we haven’t given you enough Work Out for one day, but here’s a clip of tonight’s episode.

There are few animals as misunderstood as the wily lesbian. As evidenced on Bravo’s hit series Work Out, now entering its third season on Bravo, there are some behaviors exhibited by Sky Sport and Spa owner Jackie and her coterie of toned lady-loving ladies that may be curious to people not familiar with gay culture.

In order to foster understanding for the lesbian community, I’ve recruited some of my lesbian friends to answer to viewer-submitted questions. Hopefully, they’ll be able to shed light on the behavior of some of the gals on Work Out (”What’s the deal with Jackie’s relationship with Rebecca?”) and the community in general (”If a lesbian attacks you, should you play dead, climb up a tree or punch her on the nose?”).

Bruce from Tuscaloosa asks: I noticed that on this season of Work Out, Jackie’s hair has changed rather dramatically. Before, she had a spikey, cyber-punky short haircut. But now she’s let it grow out and it’s a much softer look. Do you approve of this transformation?

Sam: I think she looks good with both hair styles. Past that, I don’t care.

Jasmine: She is trying to show that she is more relaxed because of all the sex she is having in her new “healthy” relationship. It’s an “I just got out of bed and haven’t had time to use product or get my hair cut” kind of do. I think it is a farce - I do not approve.

Michelle from Atlanta wonders: Rebecca is driving me positively batty! Batty, I say! She keeps saying she’s not jealous, but her talk is pretty cheap considering she is always watching Jackie and complaining she doesn’t get any attention. Am I overreacting?

Sam: Well the answer is simple. Rebecca is clearly still attracted to Jackie, but Jackie clearly still has feelings for Rebecca and is enjoying the drama (as most lesbians do for some god awful reason). Jackie wants to play with fire and hasn’t told Rebecca to back off and stop saying how she misses her and wants to spend time with her. So no, you are not overreacting but Rebecca isn’t alone in this. Jackie still wants the attention from one hot girl. And I don’t blame her. Rebecca is hot, as long as she doesn’t talk.

Jasmine: You are not overreacting! Rebecca is totally jealous and annoying.

Cheryl from New Brunswick wants to know: Jackie said she fell for her new beau in a matter of five minutes. Is that the way it usually works with lesbians?

Sam: I would love to tell you, Cheryl, that this is not the case, but there have been way too many scenarios where this is true. Women tend to be more in tune to their emotions and how they feel about people. They follow their heart and not their head. With men, it tends to move a little bit slower and more rationally [ed note -- have you seen gay male culture?]. So if you get two women in a relationship, it usually speeds up the process. But women can also rush into things and get blinded by lust, especially if sex is involved early on and not realize its nothing more than an instant attraction which then makes the drama that much worse when the breakup happens. Everything seems to always be more dramatic and intense between women.

Jasmine: If it doesn’t work that way - then you aren’t truly a lesbian.

Roy from Cincinnati ponders: This doesn’t have anything to do with Work Out, but I just want to know — what exactly is it about Angelina Jolie?

Sam: Oh Roy… hmm… where to begin. First off, there is something about a woman being unbelievably gorgeous and also knowing she can kick your ass. And those eyes. She beats you down with those eyes. And her smile. And that body. Basically my prayer every night is that one day she’ll realize she is attracted to women and not Brad Pitt and I can be there for her and help out with her… feelings.

Jasmine: Good question. Maybe its her incestuous tendencies, her sleeping with female models, her drama-filled marriage to Billy Bob Thorton, or her chic way of adopting a child from every country (the latest celeb accessory) that make her every lesbian’s dream date.

Do you have a question you would like to ask one of our resident lesbians? E-mail us with it at tifaux -at- gmail -dot- com.

For better or for worse, Work Out is coming back.

Who am I kidding? Definitely for the better.

I wrote about this before, but Work Out is a show I find inexplicably irresistible. Even though there’s no competition aspect to keep me interested, there is enough gay drama and sufficient hard bodies to keep me coming back.

Here’s a preview of season three, which debuts April 22.