Posts filed under 'The Bionic Woman'

Obituary: The Bionic Woman

bionicwom.jpgHere lies the body of The Bionic Woman. She died at the age of half a season after being pronounced dead by NBC.

She leaves behind a Gilmore Girls-ian little sister, an upstaging robotic rival, a scenery-chewing leading lady and a stunt casted mentor who they killed off not a moment too soon.

The cause of death has been attributed to lack of focus and general apathy.

1 comment February 22nd, 2008

The More You Know: Remember 2003 edition

February 19th, 2008

The More You Know: Neon edition

I like things that are bright.

February 1st, 2008

The More You Know: Nosebleed edition

Dry air, anyone?

1 comment December 18th, 2007

The More You Know: Horseless carriage edition

I want to be one of those old rich dudes with the antique car license plate.

4 comments November 16th, 2007

The More You Know: Hey, hey, ho, ho edition

Strike, strike, strike.

1 comment November 7th, 2007

Papa! Papa can you hear meeeeeeee?

Daddy issues: it’s the hot new internal turmoil for characters on the small screen.

That’s not to say paternal conflict hasn’t been mined since Hamlet as fodder for character motivation (although I suppose that was more uncle/stepdad or ghost daddy issues). But if you’re watching any TV these days there’s at least one show with a prominent father-related plotline. Lost, for example, is chock full of alcoholic dads, power-crazy dads, deadbeat dads and Machiavellian con artist dads. Characters with major father conflicts include Jack (and therefore Claire, kinda), Locke, Hurley, Sun (and Jin’s father-in-law), Ben, Sawyer, Penny and Kate (step-father — remember? She blew him up).

So, here is a sampling of daddy issues rated on a scale of 1 to 10 for intensity. One being “C’mon, can I borrow the car?” and 10 being “Why’d you have to push me out of the 8th floor of your apartment building?”

Jack on Lost — 8.0

Like father, like son — at least when you’re talking about alcoholic, type-A surgeons. Jack’s entire backstory is anchored by his relationship with his father. Even his romantic entanglements seem secondary in comparison to his quest for his father’s approval. On a show with no shortage of bad dads, this one is the most all-consuming.jadad.jpg
“Aww… you look very nice in your white coat son. Now fix papa a bowl of bourbon.”

Locke on Lost –10.0

Locke is such a douche bag that I hardly care about his daddy issues, but the plot line about his con man dad is so cartoonishly messed-up that it is entirely necessary to mention. Locke’s dad has: tricked Locke out of a kidney, pushed him out of a window in an attempt to kill him and bereated him even while he was Locke’s prisoner on the island. Not that anything about Lost is realistic, but the extent of evil in Locke’s dad is pretty out there.

Nick on Dirty Sexy Money — 5.0

Nick has spent his entire life trying to not be his Dad, Dutch, by getting into do-good law and being the consumate family man. But the premise of the whole series is that he’s trying to avoid falling into the same traps his dad did while working for the Darlings. Then there’s the whole murder mystery angle — was Dutch murdered? Were the Darlings behind it? On some level, Nick doesn’t really care, but he’s a decent guy so he has to find out. I’m going to go on record here as saying that I don’t think Dutch is dead (they didn’t find a body). I base this on nothing but instinct (my instincts are rarely correct, though — remember when I thought Burke was going to kill himself on Grey’s Anatomy? Ah, memories.).

Dexter on Dexter –4.0

dexdad.jpgDexter’s dad is actually a good one. I mean, he’s kind of wacky, but he prevents innocent people from dying. Dexter’s dad, for those of you who don’t watch, died a long time ago, but instilled the “Code of Harry” in Dexter. He taught his young, adoptive sociopath to satisfy his bloodlust with hunting and, eventually, by only killing people who really deserve it. Papa Dexter comes back through flashbacks with a child star playing young Dexter (complete with matching mole!). Nowadays, Dexter’s psyche is very much haunted by the memories of good old dad.

Parkman on Heroes — 7.5

Parkman was abandoned by his father — who is apparently now the worst hero ever. Worse than Sylar even. We have much to learn about this one.

George on Grey’s Anatomy — 5.5

You know, Grey’s Anatomy is pretty awful most of the time, but they managed to do some good stuff with the death of George’s dad. The bit where Christina talks to him about the “dead dads club,” the part where George freaks out on Dr. Weber because his Dad didn’t know any better than to get the risky surgery — all pretty affecting moments on a show where I’m not used to giving a rat’s ass. Or even paying close attention for that matter. That storyline has faded now, but it’s probably best left untarnished.

The Bionic Woman’s dad — meh

There’s something going on with him because why would the sister be living with Jamie if the dad’s still around. But this show is so awful that who really cares? It won’t be around next season to explore that plot line anyway.

4 comments October 31st, 2007

The More You Know: Boston edition

Sox win!

October 29th, 2007

The More You Know: Cold precipitation edition

I miss summer already.

2 comments October 25th, 2007

The More You Know: Polyethylene edition

This “edition” brought to you by the random word generator.

2 comments October 22nd, 2007

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